Bonds of friendship tightly sewn together through the years
M’CHIGEENG—Friends are among the most precious of the gifts we receive in life and lifelong friends especially so. This past week a group of elders came together at the M’Chigeeng home of longtime educator Grace Fox to celebrate one of their own and reminisce about the days of old and to honour their friend with a handmade quilt.
Elder Pauline Debassige may be best known in her community as a longtime school bus driver, but she has worn many diverse hats during her long and fruitful life. In her youth, she was as likely to be found changing a tire or working on a car or truck as preparing a meal for her family.
“I came to M’Chigeeng as a high school graduate to go to teachers’ college and she was the chief’s lady and she was so smart and so beautiful, such a nice lady,” recalled Ms. Fox. Some good-natured teasing was voiced by one of Ms. Debassige’s friends, “What happened to you?” resulting in laughter.
Ms. Fox explained that, a couple of months ago, she was at Ms. Debassige’s home and was shown some fabric pieces. “You make quilts, would you take these pieces and make a quilt for me?” Ms. Debassige asked her. “Of course I will,” replied Ms. Fox. “I had Kim Aelick come and help me, Levina (Johns) came and helped me.” With many hands, the quilt soon took shape and was completed.
The group of elders have long been friends and often worked together on projects at a former elders centre, closed down several years ago by former chief Joe Hare baa, noted Ms. Fox. The group lamented the loss of their space, but that has not stopped them from doing little projects together.
There was plenty of laughter and conversation, recalling earlier days, many of them at residential school. Ms. Fox noted that, although there were many negative things about residential school, she and her friends did not experience them.
“We spoke our language,” noted Ms. Fox. “The nuns would send us up on a hill and tell us to go and keep ourselves busy. We would talk in the language among ourselves. When we came back down the hill, we spoke English again.”
For many residential school survivors, the elders explain, their experiences are recalled with mixed feelings, not all of them negative, as although separated from their families (often with encouragement from parents and guardians to attend as it was considered economically advantageous to learn English and the skills at the school) but they were there with their friends and siblings and found joy in their games and shared experiences. To be clear, expressing those stories is not a politically correct “truth” these days, but it is their truth as they see it and not for this writer to challenge.
Following the gifting of the quilt, the friends sat down to a meal catered by Pam Roy consisting of fish pie, corn soup, salads and a host of delicious desserts, all leavened with plenty of conversation and laughter.
